Three Reasons You Should Never Apologize
Expressing your apologies when you're at fault is something I fully support. Too often, though, we're overly apologetic. "I'm so sorry, but -", yep, we've all said it many a time. You didn't even do anything wrong! It makes you look weak and people are less likely to take you seriously. With that said, here are a couple things I would love to encourage you to stop feeling bad about because I believe in you and that you're time is better spent not constantly apologizing.
1. Saying No
You couldn't go out with your friends so you say "Sorry, I couldn't join y'all last night". But why are you sorry? Are you sorry you were so tired from work that you chose to stay home and rest? Are you sorry you didn't feel like socializing? You have the right to say no... to anything, not just social outings.
Listening to people's problems when they're upset or sad is a trait I've always had. Even if you're a stranger, I'm there to listen. If you're the same, you identify as an empath. You "absorb other people's emotions because of your high sensitivities". It. Is. Exhausting. Day in and day out your phone rings and rings, people stop you in the grocery line, and you are just plain tired because they sucked the happiness right out of you. This is that time where it's okay to say "no" and not be sorry. You have to find a balance and not become a target for "energy vampires". It's really a battle, because you don't want to let that person down and know that they need you. You have to remember, you come first and that's okay.
Don't feel guilty, the need to please everyone, or afraid of rejection. Become more assertive sans aggression and make it clear you're not available. Sincerity really does go a long way (the only things I like sugar-coated are my M&M's). Value your time and your self enough to know your limitations. Solitude requires no apology.
2. Being Confident
Being confident and just being straight up egotistical are two entirely different beasts. You've worked hard to open yourself up to the world; to get where you are. Be proud of your achievements and flaunt them. If you don't tell the world about it how the hell will they know just how awesome you are? Take that selfie, wear that stunning outfit, sing at the top of your lungs, but whatever you do promise yourself you'll do it with confidence.
Egotists. They feel good about their selves only at the expense of someone else feeling bad. Don't be an egotist. They're constantly trying to measure up and compare; it's petty and pretty much the opposite of being confident. Very gauche. They wish they had your confidence! If you don't let your confidence crossover to the arrogant dark side you will unleash the super power of happiness. Find people that support your achievements and your happiness. Uplift them in return to be just as confident. Don't apologize for how good you are. Trust me, it's an amazing feeling.
3. Having Imperfections
You get an unexpected visitor and say "Please, come in. Sorry my house is a mess!". Someone compliments your beautiful outfit and instead of saying 'thank you' you feel like you have to apologetically explain you got it at a thrift store for $2. I'm guilty of this. Just the other night when I came back to our table from the bathroom while at dinner I noticed my makeup had run amuck and I felt the need to say "I'm sorry, I didn't realize I messed up my makeup." Then I thought, "What the hell am I apologizing for?!"
We are our own worst critics. Trust me, half the things you think that make you imperfect no one else notices. We assume they're judging us, and sometimes yes they are, so in return we become self-conscious and eventually feel guilty and apologetic. In a way, we feel if we point out our flaws before others do they can't say anything. Stop insulting yourself and don't apologize for your imperfections.
On that note, I challenge you to go 24 hours without saying sorry! Let me know how it goes! Leave a comment. Tell me your thoughts. What are some things you think people say sorry for too often?
I hope your day is as fabulous as you are!